A day in the deer blind. A Timeline...(starting the night before)

10:00 P.M. Tell wife and family (In-Laws) "Good Night"), get in bed so I can get up early to hunt in A.M.
10:03 P.M. Wife comes into room looking for purse which is on dining-room table (where she just ate dessert).
10:05 Granddaughter opens door and asks where Grandma is. I add P.S. to tell everyone in the house to leave me alone because I'm getting up early.
10:06 Wife sticks her head in the door and asks why I'm being mean to the kids...I reply that they are already past their bedtime. She replies that I'm turning into a grumpy old fa rt who needs to get more rest-I reply that that is what I'm trying to do-she leaves slamming door.
11:49 Wife comes to bed and asks if I'm awake (I am, due to the traffic in and out of the adjoining bathroom..) She goes to bathroom.
12:35 Wife comes to bed and ask what my plans are tomorrow. I inform her that it IS tomorrow and I might sleep all day because I DA MM sure can't tonight.
1:00 Wife says "I can't talk to you" just before I drift off, then proves that she still can...
1:46 Wife drifts off after reciting every single word in the Merriam-Webster dictionary at least once.
2:00 Go to restroom just to enjoy the silence.
2:05 got back to bed, move wife's limbs around so I can get into bed, and close eyes.
5:45 A.M. Alarm goes off, fight back urge to smack wife in forehead with clock.
5:51 A.M. Alarm goes off again because I hit snooze. Once again, I resist urge to hit wife with alarm clock-I get up.
5:58 A.M. Get in car after donning approx. 178 lbs. of cold-weather gear.
5:59 A.M. spend several minutes getting all of this hot crap off so I can drive to the field.
6:01 A.M. Put on all removed clothing so my 'nads don't fall off before i reach the blind.
6: 05 A.M. Set up in blind, arrange binoculars, gun, water bottle (empty-damm), and open windows-be vewwy quiett.....
9:35 A.M. Argue with self over leaving so soon, but decide to anyway because I can't feel anything below my knees or above my chin.
9:36 A.M.Cuss a lot and throw everything I have except myr gun because the buck I've been stalking all week was hiding just behind the brush in front of my
blind, he just hadn't stepped out yet and I just spooked him into the next county!...
9:50 A.M. After locating and recovering most of my stuff, I decide to check the game camera posted at the other feeder.
9:52 A.M. Memory card in game cam shows 7 pics of the last 6" of the feeder legs but the rest is black-batt. is dead... Ground shows lots of turkey tracks and a few small deer.
10:00 drive to closest town for good batteries and a bag of corn.
10:40 Throw batteries and corn in car and head back to farm.
11:28 Install batteries, fill feeder and go to house for lunch..
4:00 Load up and head to blind, spread corn with bucket, sit in blind, wait for feeder to go off...
6:03 Feeder goes off right at dark-need to reprogram but don't have a clue where directions are.
6:25 Head to house in dark tripping over stuff and scaring every deer in a 1.5 mi. radius.
6:30 Stand in front of fireplace vowing to never go hunting again.
6:40 Sit down at table to eat several of the Dove that were shot just a month ago and plan strategy for the hunt tomorrow...
This is my world, how 'bout yours?...