A Bizarre true camping story with pictures.

[Burke]

I went camping with my 10 year old son and one of his minions this past winter.
I took both of my dogs and 2 firearms, My Beretta .40 96D and my DPMS A-15 w/ all the goodies. My son brought assorted Airsoft for funtime.

Great drive up, crisp winter air...all is well.
I unloaded the Explorer and set up my tent by 5:30, the sun is still up and behind my site, snow run off from the nearby mountain has created a small stream which glistens and beckons my dogs to dive in..they do.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...er32/camp9.jpg

My son is playing HALO with his friend and I start in on my beer as I break open the package of TRI-TIP from my Igloo...life is good.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...er32/camp1.jpg


I cook a hearty meal (Dogs score 2 small kills on my sons plate) but all is well..I'm feeling good and the fire is warm.
My son wants to go out on a "Night Recon Mission" so I tape and wire flashlights to their Airsofts and grab my AR sans magazine (well actually I had one in my back pocket..just in case...ya know..Yeti's / other animals.)
So we set out down next to the river hunting the "Hoard".
I was able to relive my childhood with my son and his friend for about an hour in the desert that night..We engaged hundreds of Mutants and Helicopters from everywhere with the most ear deafening mouthed machine gun noises...It was great..1 small thing..if you happen to have a laser, any type will do...take it and point it horizontally thru some tall grass, it looks super cool..The kids thought it looked like a laser scanner..so I would "scan" the brush before we entered into a "hot zone".
Great memories.

So we get back to camp, I am breathing heavy and am butt tired..the kids are playing with the fire and wasting marshmallows in the fire..racing to see whose will burn faster..
We make Smores...but until someone either burns their mouth or hand with Smores..yer just not camping.
So my sons friend "Vinnie" burns his right index finger. I put ice in a bag and duct taped it to his wrist..he's all good.
We're sitting by the fire and i'm feelin no pain as I finish off an almost frozen beer.
The kids get inside the Explorer and are freezing so I turn the heater on for about 10 minutes in the car to get them warm before I throw 10 blankets on them.
I secure the dogs inside with them and make my way back to the fire.

I am joined by my friend Jack at the now newly fueled fire..
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...r32/camnp1.jpg

I stare at this for the next 2 hours...I cannot take my eyes off of it..it owns me.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...er32/camp2.jpg


At about 11:30 I am toast...I fall into my tent and try to wrap up in my bag (never quite made it fully in).
I am now in La La land and out cold..

1:00 am I am awoke by the most horrific of crashing noises.
I sat bolt upright (big mistake) and am amazed to see headlights beaming almost into my tent..I'm still wondering if what is happening is real.
I then hear a woman screaming.
I grab for my AR.
Thoughts begin to race thru my head..Drug Dealers? Kidnappers? Rapists?
I chamber a round and turn my Aimpoint on. I am sobering up quickly..I unzip my tent and take a peek outside..

To my amazement visual and audio..there is a truck that has taken a corner too tightly and has almost gone off into a huge ravine..it is trying unsuccessfully to free itself and is peeling out making huge clouds of dust.
I advance slowly using the night to my advantage (I was still fubar, just picture a 40 year old slightly overwieght severely drunk guy bumbling thru the brush trying to be a SEAL...that was me).
I sat down about half way up (needed air bad) and listened to what the driver was saying when he'd let off the gas..

"Maybe we shoud just wait til morning for help...etc"

So in my drunken state I surmise that they are just some kids in need of help..I return to my camp 80 yards away and exchange my AR for the Beretta. I pocket the .40 and start walking up the road to assist.

The dust is still in the air as I come into view of the Driver and his passenger out of the cold darkness. (Remember I am 40 miles out into the AZ desert on a lonely dirt road at the base of a mountain range.)
The girl sees me first and I watch her eyes grOw huge as she screamS at the top of her lungs "OH MY GOD THERES A MAN !!!"AAAAAUUUUUUUUGH!!!!! she then leaps into the truck (still screaming) Her boyfriend (looking like a man ready to pee his pants) says to me."Hey, Hey where did you come from why are you here, what do you want where did you come from WHAT DO YOU WANT!!?!?!"?!?!!"
"I'm sorry man, i'm camped down about 100 yards from here and heard what happened." The look of relief on his face as he discovered I was not there to use my chainsaw on him and eat his girlfriend was priceless.

So I begin to look at his truck..He's screwed..his whole undercarriage is buried. I tell them I will get them out no problem (I'm still fubar and I have kicked into Hero mode.) I return to camp and try to wake my boy..nope.
I grab my shit shovel and my Army folding shovel and head back up the hill.
As I get near them I see that the driver has a T-Shirt and light jacket.
The girl has on a skirt and light jacket and flip flops..it's 30 degrees.
I tell them to get back into the truck and keep warm..

I begin my 2 hour drunken dig into hellish oblivion..
He helps for about 5 mins at a time before he has to return to his cab for life saving warmth and apologizes profusely every time...I begin to see things while digging in the cold night air...Jack is winning.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...er32/camp8.jpg i'm the guy under the truck.

I finally get him dug out enough I hooked up muy Come-Along and good 'ol Eddie Bauer yanked him right out..and I am almost hallucinating fron exhaust and Jacks attempts to make me sleep.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...er32/camp6.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...er32/camp4.jpg

They thank me graciously and tell me their story.
Alabama AF..transferred to DM taking new wife to see "where the cowboys rode" and went a little too fast on corner #5.
And they were off..his girl took the pics.

The kicker is I put my dogs into the tent while I took care of the dig...when I pulled back down into camp..I was amazed to see my tent about 20 yards away from where I had set it up. The dogs freaked out while I was up there and ran around the tent making it roll. My AR has a nice little scratch now..but survived otherwise unscathed.

My Kid and his bud never woke up from the back of the Explorer once while I was trying to yank him out...freakin kids..

and was awoken at 7am with "Are you still going to make pancakes Dad?"

and I did..

[Windwalker]

Nice story. Good memories made there. Thanks for sharing.

[neophyte]

Burke: Sir; an ''adventure best memories are made while taking a snort
Did ja go back up the road that morning to see if that was a snort dream.

Good story

[SwedeSteve]

Great story !! Great Memories !! Too bad she saw you, could of been a blast making some animal noises out in the dark...LOL

[LiveToShoot]

Don't ya just love an eventful outing?

Thanks for sharing...

[bellx1]

what part of Arizona is that in?, I migh be up in Bullhead this summer, and/or during the school year with my aunt

[burd1959]

i must behave about the girl thing but sounds like a bigfoot imitation would of set her over the edge rlmao

[Legba]

Great story!! Love the part about the night recon.

[AKHunter]

That's great story, thanks for sharing.

[DWARREN123]

But did y'all do the "HAPPY DANCE" when the truck got pulled out? Got to do the happy dance or the mission is not complete!

[musicmaniac]

Haha! Great story Burke! Where abouts in AZ were you? What area do you live in? We may have to get together and go shootin sometime! Sounds like a good time was had by you and your boys. When was this? I know it hasn't been no 30 degrees here in Phoenix lately! Haha! Doggone heat....

[Joe Brainard]

Great one. Thanks for sharing.

[Big Dog]

BWAHAHAHAAA! A great story to tell your buds later! Too bad the boys missed it all.

[.22guy]

Good thing you weren't carrying the AR the first time you went up to the truck. They would have bother died of fright right then and there. Funny story, thanks for sharing.

[snuffysmith]

I'm am reminded of a time when I was oh, I guess around 10 or 11 down in south Fla. We lived in the sw part of Ft. Lauderdale in what was then suburbs. Lots of woods to play in. We had a river down there I think it was called The New River and during the summer we used to camp out beside it cause it looked like jungle all around and we could pretend we were not three blocks from a high-toned sub division.
To make a long story short, we were camped out, four of us, and I was an early riser, nature called me. I get up and go out of the tent to walk to the latrine; I get about 10 steps and become aware I'm not alone. It's like I said, early,maybe 5:30am and the fog off the river is right out of a scary movie. In front of me is this HUGH black man, shirtless with a machete in his right hand. I swear to God, he looked just like that guy in "the Green Mile" I forget his name. Why I didn't go to the bathroom right then is still a mistery to me. For what seemed like two hours, we just stood there, staring at each other. Him, I'm sure, wondering what the heck a kid is doing out in these woods and me wondering when he's going to chop off my head.
On remimbering the incident, I know he could see I was petrified and frozen in fear. In this deep, deep voice he asked" what are you doing out here"? I don't remember what exactly I said but I told him we were camped out over there. He said you and your friends are going to have to leave, they're coming in here with bulldozers to clear it off for fancy, water-front homes.
Back in the fifties, us kids had to use our imagination a lot and mine just about blew a fuze that morning. That was the most I have ever been scared in my life.

Snuffy