Differences Between Republicans & Democrats

Doglips · 05-04-2004, 11:49 AM

Differences Between Republicans & Democrats
Submitted by J, L, CR & TJ Morrison

Q: What's a conservative?
A: A liberal who made it through adolescence

Q: How many republicans does it take to raise your taxes?
A: None. The democrats do that.

Q: What is the difference between a liberal and a puppy?
A: A puppy stops whining after it grows up.

Q: What is the difference between an intelligent liberal and Bigfoot?
A: Bigfoot has been spotted.

Q: What is a conservative?
A: A liberal who's been mugged.

Q: What's the difference between a Democrat and a trampoline?
A: You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.

Q: What's the difference between a Democrat and a prostitute?
A: The prostitute give value for the money she takes.

Q: What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead Democrat in the road?
A: Vultures will eat the skunk.

Q: What's the difference between a Democrat and a catfish?
A: One is an ugly, scum sucking bottom-feeder and the other is a fish.

Q: What do you get when you cross a bad politician with a lawyer?
A: Chelsea.

Q: What do you get when you cross a pilgrim with a democrat?
A: A god-fearing tax collector who gives thanks for what other people have.

Q: Why should Democrats be buried 100 feet deep?
A: Because deep down, they're really good people.

Q: What happens when you cross a pig with a Democrat?
A: Nothing. There are some things a pig won't do.

Q: Why did God create Democrats?
A: In order to make used car salesmen look good.

Q: What is a recent Democrat graduate's usual question in his first job?
A: What would you like to have with your french fries, sir?

Q. How many Democrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A. Just one, but it really gets screwed.

Q: How many Democrats does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: It's irrelevant; they still don't know they're in the dark!

colt45 · 05-04-2004, 01:17 PM

i like it, i had to send it on to some friends. the chelse one is really a good one.

SexyRedXterra · 05-06-2004, 09:04 AM

biting but funny

05-04-2004, 11:49 AM	#1
Doglips Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Cocoa Florida Posts: 9,088	Differences Between Republicans & Democrats Differences Between Republicans & Democrats Submitted by J, L, CR & TJ Morrison Q: What's a conservative? A: A liberal who made it through adolescence Q: How many republicans does it take to raise your taxes? A: None. The democrats do that. Q: What is the difference between a liberal and a puppy? A: A puppy stops whining after it grows up. Q: What is the difference between an intelligent liberal and Bigfoot? A: Bigfoot has been spotted. Q: What is a conservative? A: A liberal who's been mugged. Q: What's the difference between a Democrat and a trampoline? A: You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline. Q: What's the difference between a Democrat and a prostitute? A: The prostitute give value for the money she takes. Q: What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead Democrat in the road? A: Vultures will eat the skunk. Q: What's the difference between a Democrat and a catfish? A: One is an ugly, scum sucking bottom-feeder and the other is a fish. Q: What do you get when you cross a bad politician with a lawyer? A: Chelsea. Q: What do you get when you cross a pilgrim with a democrat? A: A god-fearing tax collector who gives thanks for what other people have. Q: Why should Democrats be buried 100 feet deep? A: Because deep down, they're really good people. Q: What happens when you cross a pig with a Democrat? A: Nothing. There are some things a pig won't do. Q: Why did God create Democrats? A: In order to make used car salesmen look good. Q: What is a recent Democrat graduate's usual question in his first job? A: What would you like to have with your french fries, sir? Q. How many Democrats does it take to screw in a light bulb? A. Just one, but it really gets screwed. Q: How many Democrats does it take to change a lightbulb? A: It's irrelevant; they still don't know they're in the dark!

05-04-2004, 01:17 PM	#2
colt45 Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Occupied Territories of New York (Buffalo) Posts: 2,898	i like it, i had to send it on to some friends. the chelse one is really a good one. __________________ "A fear of weapons is a sign of retarded sexual and emotional maturity" -Sigmund Freud, General Introduction to Psychoanalysis "If guns cause crime, all of mine are defective." - Ted Nugent "Self-defense is Nature's eldest law." -John Dryden

05-06-2004, 09:04 AM	#3
SexyRedXterra Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: NJ Shore and Western PA Posts: 1,206	biting but funny __________________ "God doesn't always do things on our schedule, but he's always right on time."