Who's Your Daddy ?

Oxford · 11-08-2005, 12:28 PM

When someone puts in for Child Support, the proper thing to do is to find
out who the father is and see why he is not providing support. The following
are all replies that Dallas women have written on Child Support Agency forms
in the section for listing father's details. Or putting it another way...Who's
yo Daddy! These are genuine excerpts from the forms.

Be sure to check out # 11 - it takes the prize and # 3 is runner up.

1. Regarding the identity of the father of my twins, child A was fathered
by Jim Munson. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of child B, but
I believe that he was conceived on the same night.

2. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my child as I was being
sick out of a window when taken unexpectedly from behind. I can provide
you with a list of names of men that I think were at the party if this helps.

3. I do not know the name of the father of my little girl. She was conceived
at a party at 3600 Grand Avenue where I had unprotected sex with a man
I met that night I do remember that the sex was so good that I fainted. If
you do manage to track down the father, can you send me his phone number?
Thanks.

4. I don't know the identity of the father of my daughter. He drives a BMW
that now has a hole made by my stiletto heels in one of the door panels. Perhaps
you can contact BMW service stations in this area and see if he's had it replaced.

5. I have never had sex with a man. I am still a Virginian. I am awaiting a
letter from the Pope confirming that my son's conception was immaculate and
that he is Christ risen again.

6. I cannot tell you the name of child A's dad as he informs me that to do so
would blow his cover and that would have cataclysmic implications for the economy.
I am torn between doing right by you and right by the country. Please advise.

7. I do not know who the father of my child was as all xxxxxx look the same to me.

8. Peter Smith is the father of child A. If you do catch up with him, can you
ask him what he did with my AC/DC CDs? Child B who was also borned at the
same time.... well I don't have a clue.

9. From the dates it seems that my daughter was conceived at Disney World;
maybe it really is the Magic Kingdom.

10. So much about that night is a blur. The only thing that I remember for
sure is Delia Smith did a program about eggs earlier in the evening. If I'd
have stayed in and watched more TV rather than going to the party at 146
Miller Drive, mine might have remained unfertilized.

11. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my baby, after all when
you eat a can of beans you can't be sure which one made you fart.

Yep, you guessed it right. You are all paying taxes to support these dim bulbs. :nod:

gunssb · 11-08-2005, 12:38 PM

Oxford some of that was just wrong

Good to see you posting funnies as usual :nod:

Oxford · 11-08-2005, 12:40 PM

gunssb...you're right about some of that just being wrong. Maybe you would suggest which words I should change. :nod:

Ok...got'er'done! :right:

gunssb · 11-08-2005, 12:48 PM

no I was just kidding - they are all funny

Are you implying all women in the Virginias are....

:guitar: ?

Despoiler · 11-09-2005, 12:49 AM

Hey gunssb, long time no see, welcome back!

P.S. Did you ever get the hole fixed in the door panel of your BMW?

gunssb · 11-09-2005, 12:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AllenT

Hey gunssb, long time no see, welcome back!

P.S. Did you ever get the hole fixed in the door panel of your BMW?

Hi AllenT!

BMW ? I wish

But as for the rest, I deny everything...nothing happened

:guitar:

11-08-2005, 12:28 PM	#1
Oxford Super Moderator Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Gladstone, Missouri Posts: 13,021 Blog Entries: 4	Who's Your Daddy ? When someone puts in for Child Support, the proper thing to do is to find out who the father is and see why he is not providing support. The following are all replies that Dallas women have written on Child Support Agency forms in the section for listing father's details. Or putting it another way...Who's yo Daddy! These are genuine excerpts from the forms. Be sure to check out # 11 - it takes the prize and # 3 is runner up. 1. Regarding the identity of the father of my twins, child A was fathered by Jim Munson. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of child B, but I believe that he was conceived on the same night. 2. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my child as I was being sick out of a window when taken unexpectedly from behind. I can provide you with a list of names of men that I think were at the party if this helps. 3. I do not know the name of the father of my little girl. She was conceived at a party at 3600 Grand Avenue where I had unprotected sex with a man I met that night I do remember that the sex was so good that I fainted. If you do manage to track down the father, can you send me his phone number? Thanks. 4. I don't know the identity of the father of my daughter. He drives a BMW that now has a hole made by my stiletto heels in one of the door panels. Perhaps you can contact BMW service stations in this area and see if he's had it replaced. 5. I have never had sex with a man. I am still a Virginian. I am awaiting a letter from the Pope confirming that my son's conception was immaculate and that he is Christ risen again. 6. I cannot tell you the name of child A's dad as he informs me that to do so would blow his cover and that would have cataclysmic implications for the economy. I am torn between doing right by you and right by the country. Please advise. 7. I do not know who the father of my child was as all xxxxxx look the same to me. 8. Peter Smith is the father of child A. If you do catch up with him, can you ask him what he did with my AC/DC CDs? Child B who was also borned at the same time.... well I don't have a clue. 9. From the dates it seems that my daughter was conceived at Disney World; maybe it really is the Magic Kingdom. 10. So much about that night is a blur. The only thing that I remember for sure is Delia Smith did a program about eggs earlier in the evening. If I'd have stayed in and watched more TV rather than going to the party at 146 Miller Drive, mine might have remained unfertilized. 11. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my baby, after all when you eat a can of beans you can't be sure which one made you fart. Yep, you guessed it right. You are all paying taxes to support these dim bulbs. :nod: __________________ "If it's worth doing, it's worth doing right". Last edited by Oxford; 11-08-2005 at 12:42 PM.

11-08-2005, 12:40 PM	#3
Oxford Super Moderator Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Gladstone, Missouri Posts: 13,021 Blog Entries: 4	gunssb...you're right about some of that just being wrong. Maybe you would suggest which words I should change. :nod: Ok...got'er'done! :right: __________________ "If it's worth doing, it's worth doing right". Last edited by Oxford; 11-08-2005 at 12:44 PM.

11-08-2005, 12:38 PM	#2
gunssb Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: socal Posts: 1,833	Oxford some of that was just wrong Good to see you posting funnies as usual :nod:

11-08-2005, 12:48 PM	#4
gunssb Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: socal Posts: 1,833	no I was just kidding - they are all funny Are you implying all women in the Virginias are.... :guitar: ?

11-09-2005, 12:49 AM	#5
Despoiler Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: The Occupied Territory of California Posts: 2,232	Hey gunssb, long time no see, welcome back! P.S. Did you ever get the hole fixed in the door panel of your BMW?