01-19-2008, 03:12 PM
| #1 |
| Senior Member   Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: South Arkansas
Posts: 10,678
| Caught Speeding Caught Speeding. Woman: Is there a problem, Officer? Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding. Woman: Oh, I see. Officer: Can I see your license please? Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one. Officer: Don't have one? Woman: Lost it 4 times for drunk driving. Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please. Woman: I can't do that. Officer: Why not? Woman: I stole this car. Officer: Stole it? Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner. Officer: You what? Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see. The Officer looks at the woman, slowly backs away to his car, and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun. Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman steps out of her vehicle. Woman: Is there a problem sir? Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner. Woman: Murdered the owner? Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please. The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk. Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am? Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers. The first officer is stunned. Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license. The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer. The officer snaps open the clutch purse and examines the license. He looks quite puzzled. Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner. Woman: Betcha the lying bastard told you I was speeding too. |
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01-19-2008, 04:07 PM
| #2 |
| Senior Member  Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Oklahoma
Posts: 2,737
| Keep them coming-you make me laugh AH LOL!!!!!!!!!!
__________________ "Most of the troubles in the world is caused by people wanting to be important". T.S.Eliot |
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01-19-2008, 04:52 PM
| #3 |
| Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: South Arkansas
Posts: 10,678
| Thank Yee. |
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01-19-2008, 06:37 PM
| #5 |
| Listen to yur Inner Hippo   Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: South east Wisconsin
Posts: 3,395
| OK, Stop this please! I just wet my drawers laughing! 
__________________ "Quando Omni Flunkus Moritati" (If all else fails play dead) |
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01-19-2008, 10:15 PM
| #6 |
| Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 217
| Lol I want to try that now!!!! |
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01-19-2008, 10:24 PM
| #7 |
| Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: South Arkansas
Posts: 10,678
| I want to try it too LOL |
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01-20-2008, 07:58 AM
| #9 |
| Senior Member  Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Oklahoma
Posts: 3,542
| You did it again A.H. Thanks for the laugh. |
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01-20-2008, 12:53 PM
| #10 |
| Senior Member  Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Little town in ARKANSAW!
Posts: 2,141
| I have herd that one before! But it was still very funny.
__________________ If you don't have anything good to say... Don't say it!  |
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01-20-2008, 09:46 PM
| #11 |
| Member Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Far far away
Posts: 32
| Lol nice one.  |
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01-24-2008, 05:03 PM
| #12 |
| Senior Member  Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: pheasant country USA!
Posts: 1,912
| LOL |
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01-24-2008, 05:24 PM
| #13 |
| Senior Member  Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: AL
Posts: 1,661
| Good one
__________________ "Those who stand for nothing fall for anything." - Alexander Hamilton |
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