Baptist Dinner for Eight

Oxford · 02-14-2008, 05:18 PM

A group of country friends from the Cottonwood Baptist Church wanted
to get together on a regular basis to socialize, and play games. The
lady of the house was to prepare the meal.

When it came time for Al and Janet to be the hosts - Janet wanted to
outdo all the others. Janet decided to have mushroom-smothered steak,
but, mushrooms are expensive. She then told her husband, "No mushrooms.
They are too high."

He said, "Why don't you go down in the pasture and pick some of those
mushrooms? There are plenty in the creek bed."

She said, "No, some wild mushrooms are poison."

He said, "Well, I see varmints eating them and they' re OK."

So, Janet decided to give it a try. She picked a bunch, washed,
sliced, and diced them for her smothered steak. Then she went out
on the back porch and gave Ol' Spot's (the yard dog) a double
handful. Ol' Spot ate every bite. All morning long, Janet watched
Ol' Spot and the wild mushrooms didn't seem to affect him, so she
decided to use them.

The meal was a great success, and Janet even hired a helper lady
from town to help her serve. She had on a white apron and a fancy
little cap on her head.

After everyone had finished, they relaxed, socialized, and played
Phase 10 and Mexican train dominoes. About then, the helper lady
from town, came in and whispered in Janet's ear, "Mrs. Williams,
Ol' Spot just died"

Janet went into hysterics. After she finally calmed down, she called
the doctor and told him what had happened.

The doctor said, "That's bad, but I think we can take care of it.
I will call for an ambulance and I will be there as quick as
possible. We'll give everyone enemas and we will pump out everyone's
stomach. Everything will be fine. Just keep them calm."

Soon they could hear the siren as the ambulance was coming down
the road. The EMTs and the doctor had their suitcases, syringes,
and a stomach pump. One by one, they took each person into the
bathroom, gave them an enema, and pumped out their stomach.

After the last one was finished, the doctor came out and said,
"I think everything will be fine now." Then he left.

They were all looking pretty weak sitting around the living room,
and about this time, the helper lady came in and said,

"You know, that fellow that ran over Ol' Spot never even stopped!"

CalifgirlinOk · 02-14-2008, 06:30 PM

I glad I don't like mushroom's !! CUTE ONE

Midas · 02-14-2008, 06:33 PM

Yow!!!!!

damage855 · 02-14-2008, 07:34 PM

LOL I like it

Windwalker · 02-14-2008, 10:01 PM

Very good. That one brought a laugh.

02-14-2008, 05:18 PM	#1
Oxford Super Moderator Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Gladstone, Missouri Posts: 13,101 Blog Entries: 4	Baptist Dinner for Eight A group of country friends from the Cottonwood Baptist Church wanted to get together on a regular basis to socialize, and play games. The lady of the house was to prepare the meal. When it came time for Al and Janet to be the hosts - Janet wanted to outdo all the others. Janet decided to have mushroom-smothered steak, but, mushrooms are expensive. She then told her husband, "No mushrooms. They are too high." He said, "Why don't you go down in the pasture and pick some of those mushrooms? There are plenty in the creek bed." She said, "No, some wild mushrooms are poison." He said, "Well, I see varmints eating them and they' re OK." So, Janet decided to give it a try. She picked a bunch, washed, sliced, and diced them for her smothered steak. Then she went out on the back porch and gave Ol' Spot's (the yard dog) a double handful. Ol' Spot ate every bite. All morning long, Janet watched Ol' Spot and the wild mushrooms didn't seem to affect him, so she decided to use them. The meal was a great success, and Janet even hired a helper lady from town to help her serve. She had on a white apron and a fancy little cap on her head. After everyone had finished, they relaxed, socialized, and played Phase 10 and Mexican train dominoes. About then, the helper lady from town, came in and whispered in Janet's ear, "Mrs. Williams, Ol' Spot just died" Janet went into hysterics. After she finally calmed down, she called the doctor and told him what had happened. The doctor said, "That's bad, but I think we can take care of it. I will call for an ambulance and I will be there as quick as possible. We'll give everyone enemas and we will pump out everyone's stomach. Everything will be fine. Just keep them calm." Soon they could hear the siren as the ambulance was coming down the road. The EMTs and the doctor had their suitcases, syringes, and a stomach pump. One by one, they took each person into the bathroom, gave them an enema, and pumped out their stomach. After the last one was finished, the doctor came out and said, "I think everything will be fine now." Then he left. They were all looking pretty weak sitting around the living room, and about this time, the helper lady came in and said, "You know, that fellow that ran over Ol' Spot never even stopped!" __________________ "If it's worth doing, it's worth doing right".

02-14-2008, 06:30 PM	#2
CalifgirlinOk MY CAT RUDY ATE SANTA..!! Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Oklahoma Posts: 3,579	I glad I don't like mushroom's !! CUTE ONE __________________ "Most of the troubles in the world is caused by people wanting to be important". T.S.Eliot

02-14-2008, 06:33 PM	#3
Midas Troll B' Gone Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Springdale, Arkansas Posts: 3,902 Images: 2 Blog Entries: 6	Yow!!!!! __________________ "Recoil lasts for a second, gravity lasts forever"

02-14-2008, 07:34 PM	#4
damage855 Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: North Carolina / Lake Norman Posts: 942 Blog Entries: 1	LOL I like it __________________ If total goverment control will make us all safer, then why are prisons so dangerous?

02-14-2008, 10:01 PM	#5
Windwalker Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Oklahoma Posts: 4,000	Very good. That one brought a laugh. __________________ America: Love it and protect it or leave it