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Old 05-03-2008, 07:43 PM   #1
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single woman shopping

A woman was shopping at her local supermarket, where she selected:

A half-gallon of 2% milk,

A half-carton of eggs,

A quart of orange juice,

A head of romaine lettuce,

A 1 lb. can of coffee,

And a 1 lb. package of bacon.

As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier.

While the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk calmly stated, "You must be single."

The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was intrigued by the derelict's intuition, since she was indeed single. She looked at her six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital status.

Curiosity getting the better of her, she said "Well, you know what, you're absolutely correct, but how on earth did you know that?"

The drunk replied, "'Cause you're ugly.".
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Old 05-03-2008, 11:09 PM   #2
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Old 05-03-2008, 11:44 PM   #3
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rofl
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Old 05-04-2008, 07:47 AM   #4
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LeftHandShooter: Sir; now that was just ugly
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Old 05-04-2008, 09:46 AM   #5
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Lol, there could be lots of truth in that statement. See what happens when you let your curiosity get control of your mind. You may get your feelings hurt.
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Old 05-04-2008, 09:48 AM   #6
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Lmao lol
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Old 05-04-2008, 02:42 PM   #7
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It sounds like one attributed to Winston Churchill.

As the story goes, he was seated at a formal, sit-down dinner next to a grande dame type of woman who proceeded to bore the table silly. In an attempt to relieve the tedium, Winny drank a lot more brandy than was good for him.

Eventually, he turned to the woman and said, "Madam, you are ugly and a bore."

The woman was shocked. "You, sir, are drunk!"

"True, madam, true. But in the morning, I will be sober."
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Old 05-04-2008, 06:19 PM   #8
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Cyr, I'd heard the quote differently, but it was attributed to a discussion with Elizabeth Braddock.

The variations on the quote (as there is no definitive evidence) can be seen here: Winston Churchill - Wikiquote
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