How could Hillary get the nomination?

Cyrano · 05-09-2008, 07:05 PM

Here's a new thought game to play.

How could Hillary Clinton win the nomination in 2008?

The idea is to come up with semi-plausible ways Slick Hillary could get the top slot on the Deomcratic Party ticket this year. I'll start.

After the June elections, Obama has so many pledged delegates in his pocket that all it will take is a couple of dozen superdelegates signing on to his candidacy to lock up the nomination. Slick Hillary refuses to drop out, saying, "It ain't over 'til it's over." Obama ignores her and begins flying around the country as the nominee-presumptive, making speeches and raising money for his run starting in August, and generally trying to look presidential.

While enroute to a big Democratic rally in Michigan four days before the convention, his plane is shot down into the Great Lakes. Obama and all aboard are killed. No bodies are recovered.

In shock, and with no one else to turn to, the Democrats nominate Slick Hillary as their standard-bearer. She continues to struggle with money issues, however, because Obama's will had a codicil that said any monies left over in his war chest were to be donated to the United Negro College Fund and thus are not available to Hillary. She starts a legal battle to break the will and pirate the funds.

Two days before the election, BBC America breaks a news story that one of their investigators has tapes of Slick Hillary meeting with a mercenary and discussing an airplane shoot-down and how much it would cost.

What would happen then, hmmm?

Okay, your turn.

riverrat · 05-09-2008, 09:44 PM

Slick Hillary ends up with the nomination because Slick Willy was on tv last night telling the nation that " He had no sexual relations with that black man"

Windwalker · 05-10-2008, 07:51 AM

Once upon a time Hillary sees the light and realizes her entire political stance on gun control has been wrong and wants to abolish all gun control laws because she realizes that citizens need firearms to protect themselves as is their guaranteed individual Second Amendment right, rallies the conservatives from both parties behind her, and wins both the Democratic nomination and the General Election by a landslide victory.

Am I correct in believing that all fairy tales are supposed to begin with "Once upon a time"?

Big Dog · 05-10-2008, 04:04 PM

Shrillery does not need the nomination - just the Veep position.
Once the Whitehouse is secured for her party, next day the Esteemed Mr. Obama is found to have been "Vince Fostered".
Once installed as Prez., Ms. Clinton vows to uncover the "Vast Right Wing Conspiricy" behind Mr. Obama's fate.

Well, it may just be possible.....

knightRider · 05-10-2008, 04:20 PM

funny guys this made me laugh more more more!

ghost_raven · 05-12-2008, 02:53 AM

Kind of funny that even somethingawful.com picked up on this:

How Hillary Will Win the Nomination

nathangdad · 05-12-2008, 03:57 AM

Hillary will have to play the race card. In recent polls she can barely beat McCain and Obama barely cannot beat McCain.

Hillary hints at it all the time - millions of Americans will say the politically correct thing when polled but when in the voting booth will not vote for a black man.

Her last tactic will be a full court press on superdelegates who are really not pledged to vote for Obama even though they give press releases saying they will vote for Obama.

If she doesn't play the race card the Democrat Party will expect her to give the most ridiculous speech in living memory when she addresses the convention saying she supports Obama and asks all her supporters to work for Obama's election.

TXplt · 05-12-2008, 04:03 AM

I'm kind of wondering why this is in the humor forum.

Some of the theories seem plausable to me

DWFan · 05-15-2008, 10:53 AM

The Obama look-alike that's doing car commercials in the Dallas TX area goes nationwide.

Ownr_Notavictim · 05-15-2008, 12:19 PM

Hugo Chavez and Danny Glover both team up again from their home office in Harlem to travel the country on a "Support Socialism & Obama" tour. The people begin to love the Communist dictators so much that Hillary promises to choose Chavez as her running mate if elected. Obama has so much admiration for Her (as much as any elitist could have) that he conceeds the nomination to her on principle.

Howard Dean decides that the Democratic Party needs a 3-letter name like the GOP so he changes the name of the Party to the "Party Overwhelmed by Socialism" (P.O.S.) (or "Piece of Sh*t") Party. They all start a Commune and move to live with the "Endangered Polar Bears" in the Arctic led by Al Gore since he convinced them that Global Warming has made it Tropical up there now.

Capt'n Mil Coll · 05-15-2008, 02:13 PM

Hillery hires a patsy. An ex marine that she sends to China for a year or two. He marries a Chineese woman and returns to the US. In the meantime Obama is elected president with Hillery as VicePresident. Obama gets in a motorcade in Alabama and rides around the city. Hillery has her patsy shoot Obama from the 5th floor of the Chineese Blue Dress Laundry building. But in reality Hillery has the CIA planted in a storm sewer and shoots Obama from the front and to the right. Hillery is sworn in on Airforce One on the trip back to Washington DC. The patsy is taken care of on his way to jail.

05-09-2008, 07:05 PM	#1
Cyrano Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: New York Posts: 1,609	How could Hillary get the nomination? Here's a new thought game to play. How could Hillary Clinton win the nomination in 2008? The idea is to come up with semi-plausible ways Slick Hillary could get the top slot on the Deomcratic Party ticket this year. I'll start. After the June elections, Obama has so many pledged delegates in his pocket that all it will take is a couple of dozen superdelegates signing on to his candidacy to lock up the nomination. Slick Hillary refuses to drop out, saying, "It ain't over 'til it's over." Obama ignores her and begins flying around the country as the nominee-presumptive, making speeches and raising money for his run starting in August, and generally trying to look presidential. While enroute to a big Democratic rally in Michigan four days before the convention, his plane is shot down into the Great Lakes. Obama and all aboard are killed. No bodies are recovered. In shock, and with no one else to turn to, the Democrats nominate Slick Hillary as their standard-bearer. She continues to struggle with money issues, however, because Obama's will had a codicil that said any monies left over in his war chest were to be donated to the United Negro College Fund and thus are not available to Hillary. She starts a legal battle to break the will and pirate the funds. Two days before the election, BBC America breaks a news story that one of their investigators has tapes of Slick Hillary meeting with a mercenary and discussing an airplane shoot-down and how much it would cost. What would happen then, hmmm? Okay, your turn.

05-10-2008, 07:51 AM	#3
Windwalker Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Oklahoma Posts: 2,904	Once upon a time Hillary sees the light and realizes her entire political stance on gun control has been wrong and wants to abolish all gun control laws because she realizes that citizens need firearms to protect themselves as is their guaranteed individual Second Amendment right, rallies the conservatives from both parties behind her, and wins both the Democratic nomination and the General Election by a landslide victory. Am I correct in believing that all fairy tales are supposed to begin with "Once upon a time"? __________________ America: Love it and protect it or leave it

05-10-2008, 04:04 PM	#4
Big Dog Moderator Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Tallahassee, Florida Posts: 9,844	Shrillery does not need the nomination - just the Veep position. Once the Whitehouse is secured for her party, next day the Esteemed Mr. Obama is found to have been "Vince Fostered". Once installed as Prez., Ms. Clinton vows to uncover the "Vast Right Wing Conspiricy" behind Mr. Obama's fate. Well, it may just be possible..... __________________ Moderator of: AR15/M16, M14/M1A, New/Beginning Shooters and Militaria/Collectables.

05-10-2008, 04:20 PM	#5
knightRider Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: you know where Posts: 2,174	funny guys this made me laugh more more more! __________________ I'm Called The Devil By Some .

05-12-2008, 02:53 AM	#6
ghost_raven Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Albuquerque, NM Posts: 404	Kind of funny that even somethingawful.com picked up on this: How Hillary Will Win the Nomination __________________ The First Amendment defines America, the Second Amendment defends it.

05-09-2008, 09:44 PM	#2
riverrat Member Join Date: May 2008 Location: central tx Posts: 56	Slick Hillary ends up with the nomination because Slick Willy was on tv last night telling the nation that " He had no sexual relations with that black man"

05-12-2008, 03:57 AM	#7
nathangdad Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 1,868	Race Card Hillary will have to play the race card. In recent polls she can barely beat McCain and Obama barely cannot beat McCain. Hillary hints at it all the time - millions of Americans will say the politically correct thing when polled but when in the voting booth will not vote for a black man. Her last tactic will be a full court press on superdelegates who are really not pledged to vote for Obama even though they give press releases saying they will vote for Obama. If she doesn't play the race card the Democrat Party will expect her to give the most ridiculous speech in living memory when she addresses the convention saying she supports Obama and asks all her supporters to work for Obama's election.

05-12-2008, 04:03 AM	#8
TXplt Lost in the Ozone Again Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Fort Worth, TX Posts: 1,927	I'm kind of wondering why this is in the humor forum. Some of the theories seem plausable to me __________________ Old fighter pilots never die.....They just wind up in Texas

05-15-2008, 10:53 AM	#9
DWFan Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: N. Texas Posts: 278	The Obama look-alike that's doing car commercials in the Dallas TX area goes nationwide.

05-15-2008, 12:19 PM	#10
Ownr_Notavictim Registered User Join Date: May 2008 Location: Tallahassee, FL Posts: 1	Hugo Chavez and Danny Glover both team up again from their home office in Harlem to travel the country on a "Support Socialism & Obama" tour. The people begin to love the Communist dictators so much that Hillary promises to choose Chavez as her running mate if elected. Obama has so much admiration for Her (as much as any elitist could have) that he conceeds the nomination to her on principle. Howard Dean decides that the Democratic Party needs a 3-letter name like the GOP so he changes the name of the Party to the "Party Overwhelmed by Socialism" (P.O.S.) (or "Piece of Sh*t") Party. They all start a Commune and move to live with the "Endangered Polar Bears" in the Arctic led by Al Gore since he convinced them that Global Warming has made it Tropical up there now.

05-15-2008, 02:13 PM	#11
Capt'n Mil Coll Military Rifle Collector Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Right behind you. -NRA Member- Posts: 1,628	Hillery hires a patsy. An ex marine that she sends to China for a year or two. He marries a Chineese woman and returns to the US. In the meantime Obama is elected president with Hillery as VicePresident. Obama gets in a motorcade in Alabama and rides around the city. Hillery has her patsy shoot Obama from the 5th floor of the Chineese Blue Dress Laundry building. But in reality Hillery has the CIA planted in a storm sewer and shoots Obama from the front and to the right. Hillery is sworn in on Airforce One on the trip back to Washington DC. The patsy is taken care of on his way to jail. __________________ Let's light this fuse and see what happens!

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