 You know you're in trouble when...
You know you're in trouble when...
You see the cruise ship captain running toward the railing wearing a life jacket.
Your accountant's letter of resignation is postmarked Zurich.
Long distance companies don't call you to switch.
Your suggestion box starts ticking.
You have to take the bus to the bank to make your car payment.
A black cat crosses your path and drops dead.
The plumber floats by on your kitchen table.
Your wife starts charging you rent.
You take your paycheck to the bank and the teller bursts out in hysterical laughter.
A copy of your birth certificate comes in the mail marked 'null and void'.
Your pacemaker has only a thirty-day guarantee.
There are two elephants, two giraffes, and two zebras in your yard and your next door neighbor is building an ark.
You work full time and you still qualify for food stamps.
The Red Cross calls and offers you emergency assistance.
You take an assertiveness training course and you're afraid to tell your wife.
They pay your wages out of petty cash.
People send your wife sympathy cards on your anniversary.
Your secretary tells you the FBI is on line 1, the DA is on line 2, and CBS is on 3.
You see your wife and your girlfriend having lunch together.
American Express calls and says, "Leave home without it!"
The pest exterminator crawls under your house and never comes out!
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