Im looking up ticket jokes for a co-worker that got one last night...thats why the thread of ticket type jokes.
15 Things NOT to Say To a Cop When You are Pulled Over (unless you realy enjoy pain):
15. No, YOU assume the position.
14. I'm surprised you stopped me, Dunkin Donuts has a 3 for 1 special!
13. If I bend over, will I still get a ticket?
12. No, offi, offic, Lucifer . . . I'm not as think you are drunk I am. I swear to dog.
11. No, I don't know how fast I was going. The little needle stops at 110 mph.
10. Back off, Barney, I've got a piece.
9. But officer, I've got 2 different drivers licenses from 2 different states! Pick 1.
8. I know I was weaving, but I was trying to hit all the little green men!
7. On the way to the station let's get a six pack, oh don't forget the cig's!
6. You'll never get those cuffs on me . . . You Homo!
5. Come on write the !!!! ticket, the bars close in 20 minutes!
4. Hey, wasn't your daughter a porn queen?
3. How long is this going to take? Your wife is expecting me.
2. So that's what those yellow flashing lights in the school zone means!
1. What do you use those rubber gloves for, anyway?
