[Doglips]

Israel Offers Palestinians Virtual State
For Only $49.95 a Month

Jerusalem (SatireWire.com) — Proposing a compromise he hopes will ensure his nation's security, Israeli Prime Minister Ehud Barak announced Israel will allow the Palestinians to form an independent nation, but only on the Internet. The offer calls for the Palestinians to take up residence on a shared Israeli Web server, but otherwise allows them to "control their own destiny," insisted Barak, who added the Palestinians would be responsible for their own virtual police, education, and technical support. The Palestinians would pay Israel $49.95 a month to host the space, or $69.95 for the special "Deluxe Virtual Nation Package," which includes Microsoft's Site Server Commerce Edition 3.0.

Palestinian leader Yasser Arafat, who is on record demanding that a separate Palestine be carved out of the West Bank, Gaza Strip, and eastern Jerusalem, quickly attacked the proposal. "We have 'shared' our space with Israel long enough," Arafat said in a statement. "I will not sit down with Mr. Barak's government unless they guarantee us a fully-dedicated, independent server. And they must waive the $25 set-up fee."