Old 07-24-2002, 11:21 AM   #1
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Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Cocoa Florida
Posts: 9,082
Red face One day, in line at the company cafeteria

One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Jack says to Mike, "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I better see a doctor." "Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies. "There's a diagnostic computer at the drugstore. Just give it a urine sample and the computer'll tell you what's wrong and what to do about it. It only takes 10 seconds and costs $10."

So Jack deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to the store. He deposits $10, and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits. Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout:

You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy lifting. It will improve in about 2 weeks.

That night while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Jack began wondering if the computer could be fooled. He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and masturbated into the mixture. Jack hurries back to the drugstore, eager to check the results. He deposits $10, pours in the concoction, and awaits the results.

The computer ejects a printout:
1.Your tap water is too hard. Get a softener.
2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo.
3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
4. Your wife is pregnant...twin girls. They're not yours. Get a lawyer.
5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better.
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