2007 Darwin Awards

[Mooseman684]

Yes, it's that magical time of year again when the Darwin Awards are
bestowed, honoring the least evolved among us.

Here is the glorious winner:
When his revolver Failed
to fire at his intended victim during a hold-up in Long Beach , California , would-be robberJames Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the
barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked.

And now, the honorable mentions:

2. The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat-cutting
machine and, after a little shopping around, submitted a claim to his
insurance company. The company expecting negligence sent out one of its
men to have a look for himself He tried the machine and he also lost a
finger. The chef's claim was approved.

3. A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car
> > during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman
> > had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her.
> >
> > 4. After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver
> > found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting
> > from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his
> > incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone
> > waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the
> > mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable
> > and prone to bizarre fantasies. The deception wasn't discovered for 3
> > days.
> >
> > 5. An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from serious head
> > wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how he received the
> > injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see how close
> > he could gt his head to a moving train before he was hit.
> >
> > 6. A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the
> > counter, and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash drawer,
> > the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register, which
> > the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the clerk and
> > fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of cash he
> > got from the drawer...$15. (If someone points a gun at you and gives you
> > money, is a crime committed?)
> >
> > 7. Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He decided that
> > he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, grab some
> > booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over his
> > head at the window. The cinder block bounced back and hit the would-be
> > thief on the head,knocking him unconscious. The liquor store window was
> > made of Plexiglas. The whole event was caught on videotape.
> >
> > 8. As a female shopper exited a New York convenience store, a man
> > grabbed her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 immediately, and the
> > woman was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher.
> > Within minutes, the police apprehended the snatcher. They put him in the
> > car and drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out of the car
> > and told to stand there for a positive ID. To which he replied,
> > "Yes, officer, that's her That's the lady I stole the purse from."
> >
> > 9. The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a
> > Burger King in Ypsilanti , Michigan , at 5 A.M. , flashed a gun, and
> > demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't
> > open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered onion
> > rings, the clerk said they weren't available for breakfast. The man,
> > frustrated, walked away. (*A 5-STAR STUPIDITY AWARD WINNER)
> >
> > 10. When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a motor home parked on
> > a Seattle street, he got much more than he bargained for. Police arrived
> > at the scene to find a very sick man curled up next to a motor home near
> > spilled sewage. A police spokesman said that the man admitted to trying
> > to steal gasoline and plugged his siphon hose into the motor home's
> > sewage tank by mistake. The owner f the vehicle declined to press
> > charges, saying that it was the best laugh he'd ever had.
> >
> > In the interest of bettering mankind, please share these with your
> > friends and family . unless of course one of these individuals by chance
> > is a distant relative or long-lost friend. In that case, be glad they
> > are distant and hope they remain lost.
> >
> > *** Remember ... they walk among us! ***

[rasterman77]

Wow, really exemplifies my signature!
Thanks for the laughs.

[Windwalker]

Great. The most scary thing was at the bottom of the post: ***Remember...they walk among us*** lol

[billy]

i am SO proud of that bus driver.
keeping his wits about him in a tight spot like that.
things like this make me glad to be alive.

[FadingStarlight]

Gee, that guy from Ann Arbor makes me ever so proud to be from Michigan. DUNCE!!

[.22guy]

Was that you in #7 AH???