Old 01-18-2008, 09:50 PM   #1
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Rectum Stretcher

While she was 'flying' down the road yesterday (10 miles over the limit), a woman passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait.

The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, and with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, 'What's your hurry?'

To which she replied, 'I'm late for work.'

'Oh yeah,' said the cop, 'what do you do?'

'I'm a rectum stretcher,' she responded.

The cop stammered, 'A what? A rectum stretcher? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?'

'Well,' she said, 'I start by inserting one finger, then work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in. I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch, until it's about 6 feet wide.'

'And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot butthole?' he asked.

'You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge...'

Traffic Ticket: $95.00
Court Costs: $45.00
The Look on Cop's Face: PRICELESS
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Old 01-18-2008, 10:32 PM   #2
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LOL
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Old 01-18-2008, 10:36 PM   #3
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Priceless is right LOL If I'm ever pulled over I'll use it...A.H
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Old 01-18-2008, 10:41 PM   #4
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Crack me up. Hilarious.

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Old 01-19-2008, 06:30 PM   #5
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Classic
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Old 01-19-2008, 07:02 PM   #6
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know

She is fine-un. AH do you know her
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Old 01-19-2008, 10:02 PM   #7
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Great one. The lady could get away with that A.H. but if you try it we may have to ship you sunlight in a box.lol
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Old 01-19-2008, 10:13 PM   #8
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Quote:       Originally Posted by Windwalker View Post
Great one. The lady could get away with that A.H. but if you try it we may have to ship you sunlight in a box.lol
Unless the cop thinks he's cute. Then he's got a whole new problem!
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Old 01-20-2008, 07:26 AM   #9
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Ouch! Too funny! Laffin' my 6 foot butt off!!
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Old 01-20-2008, 06:52 PM   #10
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Quote:       Originally Posted by SuckLead View Post
Unless the cop thinks he's cute. Then he's got a whole new problem!

Which one, the cop or AH??? LOL

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Old 01-20-2008, 10:14 PM   #11
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Quote:       Originally Posted by snuffysmith View Post
Which one, the cop or AH??? LOL
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Wow, good question!
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Old 01-24-2008, 06:01 PM   #12
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Old 01-24-2008, 06:11 PM   #13
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right

yaw'll aint right but I like it
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Old 02-04-2008, 09:40 PM   #14
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Writing that down.
=p
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Old 02-04-2008, 09:46 PM   #15
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HILARIOUS!!!!!!
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