| **_birth order of children_**
**_BIRTH ORDER OF CHILDREN_**
* 1st baby:
* You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.
*2nd baby:
* You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.
*3rd baby:
* Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.
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*Preparing for the Birth: *
*1st baby:
* You practice your breathing religiously.
*2nd baby:
* You don't bother because you remember that last time, breathing didn't do a thing.* *
*3rd baby:
* You ask for an epidural in your eighth month.
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*The Layette*:* *
*1st baby:
* You pre-wash newborn's clothes, color-coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau..
*2nd baby:
* You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains.
*3rd baby:
* Boys can wear pink, can't they?
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*Worries:*
*1st baby:
* At the first sign of distress--a whimper, a frown--you pick up the baby
*2nd baby:
* You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your firstborn.
*3rd baby:
*You teach your three-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing.
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*Pacifier
*1st baby:
* If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until
you can go home and wash and boil it
*2nd baby:
* When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some juice from the baby's bottle
*3rd baby:
* You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.
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*Diapering:*
*1st baby:
* You change your baby's diapers every hour, whether they need it or not.
*2nd baby:
* You change their diaper every two to three hours, if needed.
*3rd baby:
* You try to change their diaper before others start to complain about the smell or you see it sagging to their knees.
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*Activities*
*1st baby:
* You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing, Baby Zoo,
Baby Movies and Baby Story Hour.* *
*2nd baby:
* You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.
*3rd baby:
* You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaners.
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*Going Out:*
*1st baby:
* The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home five times.
*2nd baby:
*Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached.* *
*3rd baby:
* You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.
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*At Home:*
*1st baby:
* You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.
*2nd baby:
* You spend a bit of everyday watching to be sure your older child
isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.
*3rd baby:
* You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children
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*Swallowing Coins (a favorite):*
*1st child:
* When first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to the hospital and demand x-rays
*2nd child:
* When second child swallows a coin, you carefully watch for the coin to pass.
*3rd child:
* When third child swallows a coin you deduct it from his allowance!
*GRANDCHILDREN:* God's reward for allowing your children to live!
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Griz drinks more coffee than Juan Valdez!
NRA Life Member
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