A wedding occurred just outside Govan in Glasgow ... To keep tradition
going, everyone got extremely drunk and the bride's and groom's families
have a storming row and begin wrecking the reception room and generally
kicking the living daylights out of each other. The Police get called in
to break up the fight. The following week, all members of both families
appear in court. The fight continues in the court room until the Judge
finally brings Calm with the use of his hammer, shouting "Silence in
Court". The court room goes silent and Ronny (the best man) stands up and
says "Judge.. I was the best man at the wedding and I think I should
explain what happened". The Judge agrees and asks Ronny to take the
stand. Ronny begins his explanation by telling the court that it is
traditional in a Govan wedding that the Best Man gets the first dance
with the Bride. The judge says "OK". "Well", said Ronny, "After I had
finished the first dance, the music kept going, so I continued dancing to
the second song, and after that the music kept going and I was dancing to
the third song, when all of a sudden the Groom leapt over the table, ran
towards us and gave the Bride an unmerciful kick right between her legs".
Shocked, the Judge instantly responded, "God, that must have hurt!"
"HURT!" Ronny replies "He broke three of my fingers
