Ridge Offers New 'Pre-Emptive' Steps to Combat Terrorism

Doglips · 02-21-2003, 07:35 AM

This is a JOKE...posted on a SATIRE site...but it makes more sense to me than the real "kit" the goverment is recomending we have.

Ridge Offers New 'Pre-Emptive' Steps to Combat Terrorism
(2003-02-20) -- At his second news conference in as many days, Homeland Security Czar Tom Ridge today announced another three-step plan for defeating terrorism. The new guidelines follow yesterday's clever slogan "Make a kit. Make a Plan. Be Informed."

The department's new website at Ready.gov will soon contain details on the new "pre-emptive" three-step program:
1) Buy a handgun.
2) Learn to use it.
3) Conceal and carry.

"Terrorism forces us to make a choice," said Mr. Ridge. "Don't be afraid. Be ready. And there's nothing that makes you feel more ready than a flat-black Glock .45 caliber automatic strapped tight to your chest, and a weekly session on the target range."

In contrast to the "make a kit" program which basically deals with the aftermath of an attack, Mr. Ridge said the new plan will stop terrorists cold at the first signs of an attack. He acknowledged that the new plan may hurt sales of duct tape, but it should boost sales of "hardware".

Stopper · 02-21-2003, 02:31 PM

Now thats what I'ma talking about!

Nutt'n makes me feel as safe as my pistola and street howitzer do!!

02-21-2003, 07:35 AM	#1
Doglips Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Cocoa Florida Posts: 9,082	Ridge Offers New 'Pre-Emptive' Steps to Combat Terrorism This is a JOKE...posted on a SATIRE site...but it makes more sense to me than the real "kit" the goverment is recomending we have. Ridge Offers New 'Pre-Emptive' Steps to Combat Terrorism (2003-02-20) -- At his second news conference in as many days, Homeland Security Czar Tom Ridge today announced another three-step plan for defeating terrorism. The new guidelines follow yesterday's clever slogan "Make a kit. Make a Plan. Be Informed." The department's new website at Ready.gov will soon contain details on the new "pre-emptive" three-step program: 1) Buy a handgun. 2) Learn to use it. 3) Conceal and carry. "Terrorism forces us to make a choice," said Mr. Ridge. "Don't be afraid. Be ready. And there's nothing that makes you feel more ready than a flat-black Glock .45 caliber automatic strapped tight to your chest, and a weekly session on the target range." In contrast to the "make a kit" program which basically deals with the aftermath of an attack, Mr. Ridge said the new plan will stop terrorists cold at the first signs of an attack. He acknowledged that the new plan may hurt sales of duct tape, but it should boost sales of "hardware".

02-21-2003, 02:31 PM	#2
Stopper Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Kansass Posts: 2,209 Images: 1	Now thats what I'ma talking about! Nutt'n makes me feel as safe as my pistola and street howitzer do!! __________________ They should have stopped at "Congress shall make no law"