A letter home from the Army

Discussion in 'The Powder Keg' started by jerry, Sep 1, 2002.

  1. jerry

    jerry Since 03-15- 2002 Forum Contributor

    A Letter From The Army

    Dear Ma and Pa:

    Am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the
    Army beats working for Old Man Minch a mile. Tell them to join
    up quick before maybe all the places are filled. I was restless
    at first because you got to stay in bed till nearly 6 a.m.,
    but am getting so I like to sleep late.

    Tell Walt and Elmer all you do before breakfast is smooth your
    cot and shine some things -- no hogs to slop, feed to pitch,
    mash to mix, wood to split, fire to lay. Practically nothing.
    You got to shave, but it is not bad in warm water.

    Breakfast is strong on trimmings like fruit juice, cereal, eggs,
    bacon, etc., but kind of weak on chops, potatoes, beef, ham
    steak, fried eggplant, pie and regular food. But tell Walt and
    Elmer you can always sit between two city boys that live on
    coffee. Their food plus yours holds you till noon, when you
    get fed.

    It's no wonder these city boys can't walk much. We go on "route
    marches," which, the Sgt. says, are long walks to harden us. If
    he thinks so, it is not my place to tell him different. A "route
    march" is about as far as to our mailbox at home. Then the
    city guys all get sore feet and we ride back in trucks. The
    country is nice, but awful flat. The Sgt. is like a
    schoolteacher. He nags some. The Capt. is like the school
    board. Cols. and Gens. just ride around and frown. They don't
    bother you none.

    This next will kill Walt and Elmer with laughing. I keep getting
    medals for shooting. I don't know why. The bull's-eye is near
    as big as a chipmunk and don't move. And it ain't shooting at
    you, like the Higsett boys at home. All you got to do is lie
    there all comfortable and hit it, you don't even load your own
    cartridges. They come in boxes.

    Be sure to tell Walt and Elmer to hurry and join before other
    fellows get onto this setup and come stampeding in.

    Your loving son, Zeb

    P.S. Speaking of shooting, enclosed is $200 for barn roof and
    ma's teeth. The city boys shoot craps, but not very good.

  2. Oxford

    Oxford G&G Evangelist

    Sounds like military life was easier than down on the farm. (ha)

  3. oneastrix

    oneastrix G&G Newbie

    I hear they can't even lay hands on you in basic training any more. Is that true compared to the military of the 60's and before?
  4. jerry

    jerry Since 03-15- 2002 Forum Contributor

    Not sure, don't take whats on TV for a grain of salt. AF basic was easy. They just liked to screw with your mind. My brother was Army 7~8 yrs ago he said it wasn't uncommon for someone to take a ride down the stairs or get butt stroked with an M-16.