A man follows a woman out of the cinema with a dog on a lead. He stops her and says "Sorry to bother you, but I couldnâ€™t help but notice that your dog was really into the film. He cried at all the sad parts, fidgeted during the boring parts, and most of all, he laughed like crazy at the funny parts. Donâ€™t you find that unusual?" "Yes," she replied, "I find it very unusual... He hated the book!" Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as Gods. Cats have never forgotten this. Where do shellfish go to borrow money ? To the prawn broker ! Why do cows wear bells? Because their horns don't work ! When is the best time to buy budgies ? When they're going cheap ! What happened when the cat ate a ball of wool ? She had mittens ! What has four legs and an arm? A happy pit-bull ! What do you get if you cross a frog with a ferry ? A hoppercraft ! Why did the chewing gum cross the road? Because it was stuck to the chickens foot ! Where does a Rottweiller sit in the cinema ? Anywhere it wants to !