Ants & Grasshoppers

Discussion in 'The Powder Keg' started by Oxford, Jun 18, 2002.

  1. Oxford

    Oxford G&G Evangelist

    Traditional Version:

    The ant works hard in the withering heat all
    summer long, building his house and laying up
    supplies for the winter.

    The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs
    and dances and plays the summer away.

    Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The
    grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies
    out in the cold.


    Modern Version:

    The ant works hard in the withering heat all
    summer long, building his house and laying up
    supplies for the winter.

    The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs
    and dances and plays the summer away.

    Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a
    press conference and demands to know why the
    ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed
    while others less fortunate are cold and
    starving.

    CBS, NBC and ABC show up to provide pictures of
    the shivering grasshopper next to a video of
    the ant in his comfortable home with a table
    filled with food.

    America is stunned by the sharp contrast. How
    can this be, that in a country of such wealth,
    this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

    Kermit, the Frog, appears on Oprah with the
    grasshopper, and everybody cries when they sing
    "It's Not Easy Being Green."

    Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front
    of the ant's house, where the news stations
    film the group singing "We Shall Overcome."

    Al Gore exclaims in an interview with Peter
    Jennings that the ant has gotten rich off the
    back of the grasshopper, and calls for an
    immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay
    his "fair share".

    Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity
    and Anti-Grasshopper Act, retroactive to the
    beginning of the summer.

    The ant is fined for failing to hire a
    proportionate number of green bugs and, having
    nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his
    home is confiscated by the government.

    Hillary Clinton gets her old law firm to
    represent the grasshopper in a defamation suit
    against the ant, and the case is tried before a
    panel of federal judges that Bill Clinton
    appointed from a list of single-parent welfare
    recipients.


    The ant loses the case.

    The story ends as we see the grasshopper
    finishing up the last bits of the ant's food
    while the government house he is in, which just
    happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles
    around him because he doesn't maintain it.


    The ant has disappeared in the snow.

    The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related
    incident and the house now abandoned, is taken
    over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the
    once-peaceful neighborhood.

    Sound familiar??
    :nod:
     
  2. Eric

    Eric Guest

    673
    0
    That was excellent!
    Again, where is that list of Senator and Representative e-mail addresses?
     

  3. NRAJOE

    NRAJOE YOU TALKIN' TO ME!? Forum Contributor

    How true, you forgot Al "Sharptongue" would be up there squawking and hollering too!