BIRDS AND BEES A father asks his 10-year-old son if he knows about the birds and bees. "I don't want to know!" the child cries, bursting into tears. The confused father asks whatâ€™s wrong. "Oh, Dad," the boy sobs. "At age six, I got the 'there's no Santa' speech. At age seven, I got the 'there's no Easter Bunny' speech. Then, when I was eight, you hit me with the 'there's no tooth fairy' speech! If you're going to tell me now that grown-ups don't really screw, I've got nothing left to live for!"