I can tell you that my Model 57 Yugo pistol, which has the same controls as the M1911, is not a hand-spanker and has minimal muzzle rise. And that little can be eliminated by the installation of an aftermarket muzzle brake which replaces the barrel bushing. A little old lady who did not have arthritis would have no trouble staying on target.
It also has a secondary "weapon": its report. ncnascarlady has told the story of the deputy putting her through pistol permit training coming down the line to ask her what she was shooting, because it was so loud. I can add to that the time one of my gun club's members came over to find out what I was shooting, that was louder than his 6 inch barreled S&W Model 29. I will note that my Model 57 makes the Hollywood "bah-WHOOM" of Harry Callahan's Hollywood Model 29 from the movies - only it does it in the real world. Add the muzzle brake, and the report will make the bad guy think you have a Barrett bullpup in .50 BMG!
As far as power goes, if that is a concern it is worth remembering that one of the specifications for the pistol intended to replace the M1895 Nagant revolver was that it had to be capable of killing a horse with one shot at 25 meters, The 7.62x25 TT-33 Tokarev pistol which won the competition, of which my Yugo Model 57 is a variant, had to meet that specification. That good enough for you?
When I talk to people looking for a home defense pistol, especially older ladies who dislike revolvers, one of my recommendations is the Tokarev, preferably the Model 57. As I've said, it has little felt recoil, good sights, is loud enough to terrify most goblins, and has more than enough hitting power to deal with bad actors, even if they are wearing body armor. Please note that the Moscow Militia, the police force for the capitol of Russia, hate the Tokarev because the 7.62 Tokarev round punches right through their military surplus body armor.
A pistol which can do all that is a good choice for personal defense, wouldn't you agree?