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Signs Your Company Is Planning A Layoff

Discussion in 'The Powder Keg' started by Doglips, Apr 2, 2002.

  1. Doglips

    Doglips G&G Newbie

    SIGNS YOUR COMPANY IS PLANNING A LAYOFF



    - The CEO is frequently overheard mumbling, "Eeny-Meeny-Miney-Moe."

    - Dr. Kevorkian hired as "Transition Consultant."

    - Windows 98 shutdown screen reads, "It's Now Safe to Start Looking for Work."

    - Company softball team down-sized to chess team.

    - Sudden proliferation of teen-age geek interns.

    - Your boss keeps asking you when he can "show your cubicle."

    - Company president now driving a Yugo.

    - Annual company holiday bash moved from Sheraton banquet room to abandoned Fotomat booth.

    - Old Milwaukee is beer of choice at company picnics.

    - Guard at front desk nervously fingers his revolver whenever you pass by.

    - Giant yard sale in front of corporate headquarters.

    - Babes in Marketing suddenly start flirting with dorky personnel manager.

    - Employee Discount Days discontinued at Ammo Outlet.

    - Company dental plan now consists of pliers and string.
     
  2. AR-tim

    AR-tim G&G Newbie

    307
    0
    WI
    Whats wrong with Old Milwaukee????Just kidding. Where do you come up with all this stuff?
    -Tim
     

  3. jerry

    jerry Since 2002 Forum Contributor

    19,937
    2,038
    USA
    Have you been to where i work? you should have looked me up i would have taken you to lunch and put it on my expense report.