They said WHAT?!?

Discussion in 'Humor Forum' started by Dressround, Mar 21, 2018.

  1. If you get a good wife,you'll
    become happy,if you get a bad one,
    youl become a philosopher. -
    I was married by a judge.I should
    have asked for a jury.-
    Groucho Marx.
    My wife has a slight impediment in
    her speech,every now and then
    she stops to breathe.-
    Jimmy Durante.
    I have never hated a man enough
    to give him his diamonds back.-
    Zsa Zsa Gabor.
    Only Irish coffee provides all four esential
    food groups: alcohol,caffeine,sugar
    and fat in a single glass.-
    Alex Levine.
    My luck is so bad that if I bought a
    cemetery,people would stop dying.-
    Rodney Dangerfield.
    Until I was thirteen,I thought my name
    was SHUT UP.-
    Joe Namath.
    I dont feel old.I dont feel anything
    until noon.Then it's time for my nap.-
    Bob Hope.
    Sometimes when I look at my children,
    I say to myself,Lillian you should
    have remained a virgin.-
    Lillian Carter (mother of Jimmy Carter)
    I had a rose named after me and I was very
    flattered.But I was not pleased to read the
    description in the catalogue...No good in a bed,
    but fine against a wall.-
    Eleanor Roosevelt.